IT'S A HARD šŸ„‘GUAC LIFE - Video of Food Fight at Chipotle Congress Heights

The Advoc8teā€™s first gif.

The Advoc8teā€™s first gif.

Yes, this is a damn shame and I hope the perpetrator is caught but Iā€™m humanā€¦and this is hilarious. You couldnā€™t make this up but chalk it up to pandemic stress. But real talk, we have to do better folks. Whatever the beef (or carnitas) it wasnā€™t that serious, letā€™s not assault people over burritos. That said, I spent 10 minutes learning how to make a gif based on this video, youā€™re welcome. šŸ˜œ

P.S. I was drawing a blank on possible headlines for this post so I asked some friends for some suggestions. These are what has come in so far. If you have a headline idea, please leave it in the comments and I will update the post.

Itā€™s a Hard Guac Life in these here Chipotle Streets - My Mother
Order Up: Burrito bowl with a side of "these hands" - Millennial Marketing Professional
Real Food for Unreal Humans - Snarky Lawyer Type
When ā€œChipā€ Hits the Fan - Ward 8 Community Leader
Black Beans Matter - Award-winning Journalist
Hard Guac Life - Award-winning Journalist
Tortilla Tango - Award-winning Journalist
Catch These Carnitas - Award-winning Journalist

Person of Interest in Simple Assault, 1500 b/o Alabama Ave, SE, on November 3, 2020

The Metropolitan Police Department seeks the public's assistance in identifying a person of interest in reference to a Simple Assault incident which occurred in the 1500 block of Alabama Avenue, SE, on Tuesday, November 3, 2020, at approximately 3:50 PM. The subject was captured by nearby surveillance cameras.

DO YOUR PART TO HELP PREVENT AND SOLVE CRIME. Crime Solvers of Washington, DC currently offers a reward of up to $1,000 to anyone who provides information that leads to the arrest and indictment of the person or persons responsible for a crime committed in the District of Columbia. Your assistance is appreciated by your community. CCN #20-157-402

Anyone who can identify this individual or who has knowledge of this incident should take no action but call police at (202) 727-9099 or text your tip to the Department's TEXT TIP LINE to 50411.

To learn more about the MPD Rewards program, please visit www.mpdc.dc.gov/rewards.