If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook you know that I have been going through something at it relates to my dog (and CHotR partner) Teddy. Today I am finally ready to talk about it.

First, I want to thank everyone for their kind words, thoughts and prayers. Although I wasn't yet able to talk about what was going on, I did appreciate everyone's compassion and interest in my little buddy and his health. Apologies for not being able to share sooner, I needed some private time to just process my feelings and emotions. I wasn't really ready to share with everyone what was going on. I thought if I shared the information that would make it real and I wasn't really ready for that yet. That said, I know a lot of readers care about Teddy and follow his adventures so I want to keep you guys in the loop. 

Last Wednesday, Teddy had been vomiting and had some diarrhea. I kept an eye on him throughout the day. It wasn't really bad but as the day progressed it concerned me enough to schedule an appointment to bring him to the vet the next day.

Good news is that by the time his appointment came around on Thursday, Teddy was back to his old self - silly and full of life. Our amazing vet looked him over and confirmed that Teddy probably had eaten something that had not agreed with him and he was now over the worst of it. I was relieved with that. But while we were there, I wanted the vet to look at a lump near Teddy's abdomen. He had always had a lump but recently it had moved and gotten bigger so I wanted to get it checked out. After discussing my options with the vet we decided he would use a needle to get a cell sample from the lump and then view it under a microscope.

A few minutes later, our vet (who is so awesome btw) came back with the news. Teddy had not one but two masses and at least one of them was cancerous. Teddy has cancer. While I had suspected as much, I was still in shock and we discussed the options. Although Teddy seems impervious to age to me, the reality is that he is at least 13 years old. I have been trying to prepare myself for the day when my best friend wouldn't be around to greet me at the door, hog all the pillows or give me one of those amazing expressions. I've tried and failed to imagine my household without my furry room mate. He's been with me as long as I've lived in Congress Heights.

I had a few options. Let nature take its course, have the masses biopsied and then take it from there or have the masses (I have a hard time calling them tumors) removed and then examined.

I know Teddy's old but he's my little guy. I don't want him to be afraid or hurt but I also don't want to close the door on his life prematurely. That said, I was worried about being selfish, about not putting his needs ahead of mine because I wasn't ready to let him go, I couldn't let him go.

So we left the vet's office and I had a lot on my mind. Halfway home I had to stop and take a video of my partner in crime (and snacks) hanging out in the back seat and that is the video I posted to Instagram. Despite my tears (and there were many) I wanted everyone to know how much Teddy has meant to me the past decade. I mean it when I say he was (and still is) my very best friend. He knows all my secrets, hopes and fears. He also doesn't judge my junk food intake. Lol. I also know how much he and our stories have meant to a lot of you. I was hesitant to share my pain and fear with you guys. I didn't want anyone to be as sad as I felt.

So that evening and the next day was spent doing a lot of crying, a lot of soul searching and a lot of hugs and kisses of my fur baby. And the next morning (5am to be exact) after discussing it with my mother, I've decided that as long as Teddy is strong enough for surgery and provided the cancer hasn't spread to his lungs that I am going to give Teddy his best shot at living more life -- no matter how long that may be. Teddy deserves nothing but the best care I can provide.

So on Monday, August 6th my best friend is scheduled for surgery to remove this tumors and after that they will to to a veterinarian oncologist who will review them and let me know what we are dealing with in the months ahead. I don't know what the future may hold, but I know that as in everything, Teddy and I will face it together.

So please, if you can, please keep Teddy in your prayers and thoughts. I'm really not ready to let him go just yet. 2018 marks not only the 10th year of this blog and my business, it also marks 10 years since Teddy first came into my life, first as a foster dog and then as a member of my DC family. I want Teddy to at least have this year and I am determined to make this his best year yet. I am hoping this surgery and my love gives him that opportunity. 

Anyway, I'm getting emotional again (cue tears) so I am going to sign off and once again, thank you for taking this mad, crazy and love-filled journey with us.