A few days ago, I was on my way into the Giant on Alabama Avenue when a man stopped me out front and asked me to sign a petition. This was nothing out of the ordinary because there always seems to be someone in front of Giant asking me to sign some new petition - and to be honest that is part of the reason I am going to stop going to this Giant (that and the decline in service and the lack of keeping my beloved honey bbq chips in stock  but that is for another post).

Anyhoo, so this guy asks me to sign his petition. I ask what the petition is for, he proudly declares, "to recall Mayor Fenty." I'm a bit surprised - but not really - and I declined to sign the petition and continued on my emergency mission to get my honey BBQ chips.

I know this disconnect/discontent between Mayor Fenty and many East of the River residents is not surprising. It's like the break-up that will never end and it's full of she said, he...okay "he's" not saying much of anything but it's definitely been the buzz in the River East streets and community meetings. The Washington Post has covered this split  several times including the latest article in which I was quoted semi-favorably for the Mayor (and appeared on the front page to boot), but I have to admit that the Mayor (and/or his communications staff) has me baffled. For the life of me, I can't understand why the Mayor continues to ignore the situation by not coming East of the River and at least attempt to mend some fences (and some hearts).

I find myself asking what everyone asks themselves after a particularly nasty break-up, "what the hell went wrong?"

The longer this plays out the larger and more bitter the split becomes. If Team Fenty waits too long to come a courtin' the River East vote it is going to feel real obvious and disingenuous - kind of like asking  for a date on a Friday night at 11:45pm.  East of the River residents are too savvy (and frankly suspicious) to fall  for that. We have long complained about being considered the "last and the least" when it comes to the attention and support of city government so a booty-call like River East campaign push  just isn't going to  hold much water. Mr. Mayor, perhaps it's time to replace some of those carefully choreographed photo-ops with some real honest to goodness dialogue. Let's "make-up" before we "break-up." To be fair, I have no doubt that the first "sit-downs" are going to get a bit heated. East of the River has a lot to get off of her chest and she may have to "wild out" a bit and do the screaming version of  pouring some bleach on your clothes and slashing a couple of your tires  but cooler heads will prevail.

I am hopefully that the community and the Mayor can reconnect again; if we can’t be sweethearts again perhaps, we can be friends, hell acquaintainces who only nod would be a step up at this point. Who knows? Perhaps East of the River can fall back in love with Adrian, that dashing young "go-getter" that made old ladies blush and young men wanted to emulate. The "man of the streets" who wasn't afraid to burn a little shoe leather to reach out to every corner of the community - on both sides of the river.

Not that anyone is asking me ( oh wait someone did) but Mayor Fenty I suggest you get over here with a quickness - flowers and chocolates are strongly recommended- lest you find everything you own in a box to the left.

In the words of the mighty (and fierce) Beyonce:
"Don't you ever get to thinking you're irreplaceable."

P.S.  Because you could never give away too much unsolicited advice (not!) I would advise the Mayor it would be best to reach out to the community himself and not to solicit the assistance of his designated team of East of the River handlers. Most of us already recognize them -at best- as wing-men and at worst as “les pimps de poverty.” Whether you want to break up or get back together, let it not be over  post-it press release. We want to see your face and hear your words. We are East of the River and those things matter.

Lord knows I am not a hopeless romantic but even I have hope we can get back together - for the sake of the  children City of course. :)


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